How Random Is Random?

This Chap is led to ask the question by his recent international travel experience, which involved TSA’s “Random” testing, of some sort, both departing and returning. And while the Chap was standing there watching his handbag being swabbed, he began to wonder — what are the odds that true “Random” testing would lead to two “Random” checks in a journey? Flattering though it may be for someone in the Gubmint to consider the Chap warrants additional scrutiny, the statistician in him got to wondering… Or to put it another way, at what point on encountering yet another request to “step to the side” might a Chap question the uniformed person’s assertion of “randomness”?

Just as a side note – my spell checker just suggested that uniformed was incorrectly spelt and suggested uninformed. This chap thinks that in many cases they might be synonyms?

To continue! Now, this Chap’s statistics are of a more specialized, psychological-type thing. Fortunately, the Other Chap, being a certified Math Whiz, may be presumed to have the Chops to figure this one out. We have every confidence. So, take it away, Maestro!

No pressure there then ….

No. None at all.

Have to see that this chap was immediately reminded of another chap, back in the 70s when hijacking was prevalent – including bombs on board. Turns out his knowledge of stats was – to say the least – rudimentary.

Go On

Well, I wasn’t intending to stop!

Anyway, suffice to say, said chap had yet another chap as a good friend who was very fearful of flying in these times. To quote him ….

I am so afraid of flying these days. I just don’t want to fly knowing there is such a high probability of a bomb being on board the plane and that I might die.

The statistician had a think and came up with his solution, suggesting that all the other chap needed to do was always carry his own bomb with him …. because though the chance of one bomb being hidden on a plane was getting higher every day … the chance of two bombs … well now – that was close to zero. Problem solved.

Wow. Brilliant. Did it work?

Graham. Seriously? Now I see why you reached out!

As far as I can see, the stats support the idea that as far as random selection is concerned there is indeed reason to be suspicious, but still in the area of possibility. Now – next time you go through LHR – and you are pulled aside, it might well suggest that there is something more than randomness going on.

Pick a person. Any person. Just not me, again.

If You Can’t Say Anything Nice…

… then at least say it differently.

The Chaps do admit to a continuing love affair with language —

“a continuing love affair with language;the sound of their own voices” — fixed that for you, you’re welcome

Have it your own way. Couple that with a love of the pithy insult — yes, this definitely reflects our feelings.

and you’ll understand how our interest was piqued by a recent tweet from The Canary. Apart from being rude enough to call the UK Foreign Secretary ‘a bag of gas

No argument from this quarter

and illustrating it thusly

it prompted one David Simon (he of “The Wire“) to retweet with a most delightful addition — a preamble describing Boris as a “Low-bottom taintsniff.” Witness a literary lion in action! We love it.

The Other Chap may perhaps recall a gift of a wall chart of Shakespearian insults?

itself giving rise to a rather nice mug.

Perhaps we should offer it as some sort of prize for something?

We did. I won.

If Trump Wants A Grand Parade…

Then a grand parade, by golly, he should have.

Of course, in a version suitably sized to the attendance at his inauguration, and tailored to both his musical taste and knowledge of military technology. The Chaps are happy to offer a preview.

So, a grand-ish parade, then.

At best…

No, no need to thank us. Our pleasure.

You can read the original story here.

Did you note the marching on that Naval chief?

Certainly did. Cadet Bone Spurs could probably do as well.

Well, if it were not for him being who he is…

The Chaps, Converse

It isn’t that we share shoes …. more that we interact.

It started as a simple chat about the ukelele as an instrument.

“Simple”? Ha!

Now, no spoilers, please.

But then, somehow, as ever… It was Another Chap that started it all, when he threw this out ..

Jazz, Classical, but ukulele?

Don’t disrespect the ukulele.

and then went right on to share James Hill doing Voodoo Child

Continue reading “The Chaps, Converse”